Unto Others

I recently went on a weeklong hiking expedition, I spent 5 days walking the mountains and camping by the seashore. Like with any continuous interaction with nature one anticipates clarity of vision and a refreshing of some sort, likewise those were my expectations before I left. I had written down the things I was hoping God to talk to me about, and hopefully comeback with a clear vision of what I’m supposed to do next to fulfil my purpose and take my hustle to the next level.

To my dismay, I just kept on having deep reminiscent thoughts of the difficult moments from my childhood. On some days I would even dream of these people who treated me badly, this bothered me for a bit, I mean the days were passing by and I hadn’t had the epiphany I needed from this trip. Until on the 3rd day I had a discussion with a fellow hiking mate, whom I had met there, that it really dawned me what exactly my subconscious spirit was bringing forth with all these throwbacks.

My new acquaintance told me about her difficult child hood and how she worked her hands to the bone to be justified. Today she looks back at those people who treated her badly and feels pity for them. She had rose above all their negativity and made something of herself, compared to how all her oppressors had fallen out of glory. It was then that I connected the dots as to why I have been feeling the way I do. When I compare notes with her, I realized how miserable the people who had burdened my childhood are today. Even their children are a sad, sad, story, like my heart bleeds for them. In the yester years they would not have imagined their lives would be where they are, to them, they will always remain above me as circumstances informed at that time. I started thanking God for helping me though those storms and bringing me to a place of independence, and peace. Next, I asked myself what was the purpose of this whole exercise because surely I had to learn something from it, otherwise it will not stop bothering me. I came to this conclusion:

Whenever you are in a position of power, never use it to intentionally oppress someone you consider to be at your mercy.

You are not only breaking their spirit, but you are also heaping a load of hot coal on your own shoulders. Burdening you with negative karma, which you will surely have to recompense for at some point in the future.

One would think that my friend and me are very special in that we were eventually vindicated from our oppressors. However, every human being is living with the same benefit. Take a moment and think back of people or a person who intentionally made your life a misery at some point in your journey. It may be a schoolteacher, stepparent, romantic partner, sales person, neighbor, friend, sibling, colleague…whoever. When you were trying your best to be kind and polite towards them, they just kept on throwing fireballs you, with no justification. Now, reflect at the life/status they had back then and where they are now, it may be in comparison to you or where they should be based on the level they were.

Chances are, they are not where they would ideally should be, or worse off than they were. Now this is not to encourage us to sit around and wait for the demise of those who oppress us, once we do that, we absolve them and bring misery to ourselves (Galatians 5v26 msg: “that means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us was better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original”). More so because we also oppress others at times without even noticing it, while intentionally using our power to benefit us. Here are a few examples:

  1. Neglect/ignorance – Delaying to deliver on a promise at an agreed time because honestly, you are too busy or pre-occupied puts the person waiting on your promise at a disadvantage. The delay may seem short on your side but it feels like forever to them.
  2. Careless talk – The moment you open your mouth to give a report about someone else, their entire reputation at that moment is dependent on your words. Don’t oppress them; if there’s nothing positive to share, pass the buck.
  3. Indecision – So you know you will not date this guy or have any future with him whatsoever, but you continue leading them on so you get adorned with attention. This person has given you power over their heart and you are playing dice with it. Okay, maybe you might consider them, but you’re honestly not sure right now; that’s okay, but make sure they know it…otherwise you are taking advantage.

These are just a few examples of how we can oppress others without even thinking about it. I will not mention those who out rightly abuse their power iand intentionally project misery with their words or actions. I personally think those people have deeper psychological issues to deal within themselves, and these are now spilling over to others. And sometimes its just pride! You know what they say about pride? It comes before the fall. Watch it.

At the end of it all, it all boils down to treating others they way we would want to be treated, on every platform, in every situation. It requires us to present and mindful of all our interactions with other people and what paradigms inform that. The wheels of fortune will always turn, so make sure that whichever direction they do take; you have humbly positioned yourself for it.

Pslam 146 vs 7: “The Lord upholds the cause of the oppressed”

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2 Responses to “Unto Others”

  1. Mosela says:

    Very interesting, I never realized I’m an oppressor myself!! I’m guilty of indecisiveness, stalling was my middle name until recently when I lost a colleague. It got into my big skull that our life is measured in terms of time. The more I procrastinate, the more I tend to lose out on many things of life. I’m a work in progress “restoration”

    Proverb: “procrastination is a thief of time” to me is a thief of life…

    Keep doing what you love “writing” and continue to bless us with your lettering….


    • misskhanyile says:

      Blessed thanks Manana, thank you for taking the time to read. I’m glad that it resonated with your spirit and are already doing something about it. Time is our currency on this earth, that’s why we “spend it”.

      PS: I extend gratitude to the special friend who helped me realise this lesson during the hike 🙂

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